My house is a disaster and I might be losing my mind.

I'm having trouble even looking at my living room.  And the table my family used to eat at every night?  It's buried under mail to be sorted and end-of-the-school-year papers that I haven't looked through.  I feel like my children having clean underwear should earn me a gold medal, and I haven't worn any work clothes that need to be ironed in at least a month.  Why?

Baseball.

Juggling work and family has always been a careful balance, as any working parent knows.  During baseball season- when each kid has 3-5 obligations each week, and never in the same place but always at the same time- the balance...doesn't balance.  Aside from my house taking a hit, my desk at work is piled with papers I really need to get to and I seriously need to start planning my next fundraiser, someday.  My Type A work personality has turned in to a Type ADD personality (in related news, I am seriously thinking of asking my doctor if Sky's ADD comes from me).  I'm a mess.

BUT...look at these faces.  Seriously.  Just look at them.

Sky, waiting to take the field.

Alex, moments after earning the coolest hat ever (the hat that comes with being chosen for the All Star team).

Skyler is taking his meds every day without reminders, not arguing about bedtime and- when school was in session- making sure he got his homework done so coach didn't bench him.  His confidence has increased and his work ethic has become admirable.  Alex is literally standing in the middle of the living room right now, working on his swing.  He never stops playing baseball.  The child talks to his coach in his sleep (seriously).

I have read countless articles bemoaning the over scheduling of children these days and the dangers of hyper-competitive sports at a young age.  Those concerns are on my radar, I promise.  But what I am learning is that some kids thrive on this stuff.  While I remember standing on the ball field wishing this game would get over already as a kid, Alex mopes around the house on "rest days" feeling like this is the most boring day ever.  He can relate anything at all to life at the ball park.  The lens he sees the world through is round and has red stitching through it.

And it isn't just about entertainment.  It's about life lessons.  A week ago, Skyler didn't want to go to practice.  He told me he was burnt out and didn't sign up for such a long season or so many practices.  His allergies were bad and he wanted to stay on the couch.  Though I felt bad for him, I told him it wasn't happening.  He made a commitment to his team, and he'd better get in the car because Coach doesn't like when he is late.  Practice is happening, dude.  Two days ago I watched him stop a runner at 3rd base, when another run could very well have meant the game for us.  On the way home, he felt awesome about his contributions against a really tough opponent.  He knew his teammates depended on him and couldn't wait to continue on in the tournament.  You know, with all the ups and downs Sky has gone through in life, I'd argue with anyone at all over the merits of that catch the other day.  It was totally worth the time, the money and the feeling that life is completely overwhelming right now.  

Today we are off to the District Championship game.  Sky's team plays a tough team for the title, and Alex will spend a few hours on the sidelines playing a mock game with all the younger siblings who want to be just like brother.  We will be super hot and tired of driving 3 hours a day for the 3rd day in a row, and we will probably bemoan the awful feeling we get after eating fast food for dinner.  But seriously?  I just wouldn't have it any other way.

Why I talk smack about my kid on social media.

I adore Skyler.  Nothing he could ever do will make me love him less, though I don't always like his behavior.  I believe that he knows he isn't perfect, and I see a desire in him to keep making progress on this whole growing up bit.  And I admit that he may be mad at me if he knew how much I post about him.  At this point I am hoping that by the time he has his own tween he will forgive me.

But I'm not sharing this stuff for him.  I'm sharing it because of all the challenges we have faced with ADHD/ODD, the hardest to deal with is how isolating it can feel.  When all you see on social media and at the park is happy, well behaved kids with excellent, calm parents- it hurts.  That is nobody's fault.  I LOVE seeing pictures of your adorable children.  I love reading about the funny things they say and do.  I am happy for your family successes and I post these things, too.  Please don't take this as me asking you not to post about the award your kid got or your child's delicious Santa picture.

But you know who else I appreciate?  The mom who posts that perhaps today-in-parenting isn't going so well.  The parent who posted that her kid had a meltdown in the grocery store and the dad whose daughter thinks he "just doesn't get it".  The adult children who mention that they appreciate their parents putting up with them because, well, sometimes they were hard to put up with.

There are parenting books on how to handle tantrums, dedicated teachers who come up with creative success strategies and wonderful therapists who help families work through power struggles.  There are many struggles that come along with a child who has extra challenges (or any kid, for that matter), and thankfully many tools to deal with these things exist.  But that doesn't mean it isn't isolating.  That is doesn't make you question your parenting or even your sanity now and then.

I know I'm not the only parent who, when asked "how is the school year going?" at a PTA meeting has to quickly think- should I really say, or will I get that "yikes, sorry I asked" look?  I'm not the only parent who has skipped a company party because I fear that a tantrum could leave my childless colleagues seeing me in a different light.  I'm not the only parent who has debated over medication vs. therapy vs. yet another parenting strategy vs. giving up and drinking wine.  But for awhile it sure felt like it.  And that made this whole situation so much harder.  What's more, since I felt isolated and was afraid to be honest about the hardships, nobody was there to tell me that it's ok and that I am NOT an awful parent who just isn't getting this mommy gig right.  So in addition to my kid's behaviors beating me up emotionally, I added a whole ton of self blame on it until I was almost drowning.  If I drown, what happens to Skyler?

And guess what got me through?  The mom who admitted on Facebook that her son's ADHD was bringing her to the point of exhaustion.  Because she was willing to admit that maybe the smiling family photo doesn't tell the whole story, but I could tell that she is a great mom and her kid will make it out of childhood just fine.

I don't want other parents to struggle but the truth is that they will.  And if they remember that time I posted that a call from the teacher completely derailed my day...maybe when they get that call, they will skip the feeling-like-a-failure stage and go straight to the figure-this-out phase.

I love my child so much.  He is incredibly empathetic and creative and funny.  I am convinced that eventually the ADHD will be a help to him- the kid doesn't need coffee to go all out, all day long!  But he isn't perfect.  And he doesn't think he is, and I don't think he is.  If I did we would just skip all this hard stuff and wish him luck in adulthood.

I am sharing it on social media because as necessary as this parenting job is, it is HARD.  And I have come to realize that admitting that isn't weakness or negative or overly dramatic- it's just real.  I will not add to it by contributing to society's habit of posting the good stuff and not talking about the hard stuff.

So I post that my kid got a referral.  Or a few.  And I post that I followed his little butt around school and check in with the teachers, even though it means eyerolls and proclamations of "you are ruining my life!".  Some parents won't understand why I post what I do.  But honestly?  I'm not posting for those parents.  I'm posting for the parent who will hopefully someday feel comfortable reaching out because they remember the time that my status admitted that from time to time my awesome kid is a pain in the butt.  Because you aren't alone, and you shouldn't feel like it.

A letter to my tween...for 30 years from now.

Hi son.

It's me.  The mom that is currently set on destroying your life.  You know- the one who calls your teachers and takes away electronics and is keeping you from seeing your friends tonight?  Yep, that's me.

I'm just here, in my room, writing my feelings out while you lay on your bed crying yours into a pillow.  You just got done telling me that I am ruining your life and enjoy doing so.  I kept my own face steely rather than allowing my eyes to well up with tears like they wanted to.  You stormed up to your room in the throes of despair.

Look, kid- it isn't that your antics are end-of-the-world awful.  You aren't a bad kid.  Really.  Everyone thinks you are intelligent, funny, confident and a natural leader.  As I spoke with the school administrator today we both had a chuckle at the crazy antics that distract from the fact that you are, at your core, an awesome young person.  And I'll even admit that it was hard to keep a straight face when I told your other parental units what it was that you got this latest detention for.  I mean, if I'd seen it in a movie I would have laughed and rolled my eyes and hoped the teacher drinks wine on a Friday night.  And when you are reading this and you have your own tween to contend with, I'm sure we will share a good giggle about your boyhood antics.

But I can't admit that to you right now.  Because today it was leading the whole class in a jarring rendition of "It's raining, it's pouring, the old man is snoring" while a flustered substitute teacher attempted to explain a math concept.  And it was a lunch detention and a call to mom and a missed opportunity to go to the Monster Bash at the school.  Today it was relatively harmless.

But what happens if I give in?  If I tell you that this wasn't SO big a deal and I know that you REALLY want to see that pretty little girl with long brown hair, so I'll let you off the hook "just this time".  That's the problem, son.  I've let you off the hook "just this time", too many times.  And if I keep letting you off the hook, someday it may be something more serious than chanting and disrupting class.  And how am I to expect that you will understand the seriousness of the consequences if you are accustomed to being let off the hook after a good speech?

It hurts to disappoint you.  It hurts to know that I am the reason you are sad, and that even if I AM acting in your best interest you won't see it for many years.  It downright sucks.  I gave you life and I have given you everything I can think of to make that life better, starting from the moment that pregnancy test read positive.  It goes against every fiber of my being to be part of anything that will hurt you.  After so many years of rushing to stop tears the minute they flow, it kills me to cause them.  And to know that if I am lucky, you will understand why in, oh, roughly 20 years.  Right now that feels like a very, very long time to me.  I promise it feels longer than a Monster Bash.

I always tell you that it is important to admit when you are wrong, and to fix it.  Well, son, I was wrong.  I went too long giving in when the tears flowed and you said you were sorry.  I went too long letting you think that a well voiced apology works like magic to correct a situation.  And this is me, correcting that.

We won't go to the Monster Bash tonight and you will stay home, hiding from your evil mom.  I will try to keep busy doing other things and repeating to myself "I am doing the right thing" 10,000 times.  I will mostly believe it, but there will still be a little part of my heart that aches for your sadness.

If you read this in 30 years, I'll assume I had you read it after I get a call from you telling me how frustrating it is to parent a tween whose parents "don't understand me AT ALL".  So here is what I will say to you: Yeah, it sucks.  But if you are reading this, that means you survived childhood.  Hopefully you are mostly unscathed.  Hopefully I am, too.

I told the Assistant Principal that I am going to be so filled with pride and joy if you manage to navigate childhood some day.  She laughed and said you will.  She thinks you are a great kid.  Guess what?  Your parents think so, too.  We think you can be a complete pain in the butt sometimes, but we absolutely adore you anyhow.  I'd imagine if you are really honest with yourself, you kinda feel the same way we do.

P.S.  I'm saving all your antics so that should you choose to become a comedian as an adult, you can use the material you dreamed up at 11.  I promise it will be better received at that point.  You're welcome.

Love you, Sky B.  Forever and ever, even when it doesn't feel like I do.

My Letter to the Today show! "What do women need?"

Just shy of two weeks ago, I was home on a sick day.  This sick day was needed for both physical and mental health reasons, so when I turned on the Today show I found that the segment I watched really hit home.  Maria Shriver was on, talking about an upcoming series called "Doing It All".  She asked the question "What do women need" to do it all?  To me, hearing this question asked- even on television where logically I knew she wasn't talking specifically *to me*, was sort of like the floodgates opening after a rainstorm.  I opened up a new email, addressed it to the Today show, and let loose.

I was surprised last week to actually hear from the Today show.  They wanted to ask me some follow up questions and said they will get back to me *if* they can fit an interview or video of myself and my sisters into this series.  Disclaimer: Don't anybody get too excited!  I am literally on the other side of the country for them, which poses a bit of a challenge.  Whether I ever hear from them or not, it was really nice to feel like when I was frustrated, someone listened.

I've hesitated to share this for 2 reasons: 1) It's personal and, frankly, was written on a day when I felt like a wagon rolling downhill with the wheels falling off; 2) I kinda put Dusty through the wringer because it had been a bad morning and I was frustrated.  He has many excellent traits as a husband (not mentioned in the letter).  Getting up early is not one of them (mentioned in the letter).

After some thought and feedback, though, I have decided TO share this letter for 2 reasons: 1) I feel like I am far from the only mother on the planet who feels like all the balls up in the air could come crashing down at any minute; and 2) when we don't talk about that feeling, it feels isolating and sometimes shameful.

So, without further ado, here is the letter that I recently sent to the Today show:

Women can do it all, because we have to.  But how long can we sustain that role?  We need help recharging and managing the "big stuff" so that the little stuff doesn't bury us.

For 10 years I have been a part of an online message board meant for moms.  The board is full of women from all walks of life, different areas of the country (and world), and many different views on life.  It often seems that we have three things in common, collectively: 1) We are moms; 2) We love our families and they keep us busy; 3) We are one blow (work or health crisis, divorce, financial hardship, etc.) from watching our house of cards fall around us.  It is a common thing on this board to see a post titled "I can't do this!", followed by message after message saying "yes, you can!  You are fabulous, you'll get through this.".  

We all take our turns as example, disaster and cheerleader.  For many women, the support of other women- whether it be best friends, family, church groups or an online message board- is what picks us back up when the world is threatening to swallow us up.  And other women offer the unique ability to support us, because we know they have been there, done that.

I am a 31 year old married mother of 2 boys, ages 7 and 10.  I am the manager of a non-profit, donation based Meals On Wheels site responsible for feeding around 325 seniors a day.  Additionally, I've been on crutches for a month as doctors try to figure out why I am dealing with severe hip pain.  With all the tests and specialist appointments, lately I have been feeling completely overwhelmed by life and all it is throwing my way.  Between keeping up my long work hours on top of all my doctor's appointments, the physical challenge of mothering and managing without walking, and the defeating pressure that all the added medical bills put on me, every once in awhile I feel like I will crack.  Monday was one of those days for me.  I worked 12 painful hours, came home exhausted and ready to be with my family, only to fall asleep before we could get to watching a Christmas movie.  

After another procedure to figure out what is going on with my hip Wednesday, followed by a tearful "I am drowning in stress, pain and exhaustion" conversation with my HR person, I am off for a sick day.  I just sent my children to school.  My 7 year old needed money for a book fair, and thank goodness my husband had some cash in his wallet.  I feel obligated to do things like give my children book fair money- I know it isn't a substitute for the attentive mom I was before I went back to work, but it's what I can offer.  My ADHD 10 year old is starting down the tween attitude path and spent the morning lamenting how unfair I am for all the various hardships I impose on him- having to be ready for school on time, no sleepovers until grades are better, etc.  My husband woke up just in time to say goodbye to the kids after I had done all the work getting them ready.  

Normally I would be going in to the office now, where I would focus on feeding seniors and, often more importantly, providing a safe and happy place for them to socialize for 4 hours.  To feed them coffee and lunch, I typically work 9-11 hours a day, 5 days a week.  When I get home, I hope and pray that dinner is already made.  If it isn't, I look around and find something to cook so that we can move on to homework, cuddle time, bedtime stories and managing sibling arguments.  Usually after the kids are in bed, I sit with my Chromebook and checkbook and try to figure out how to cover all the bills- medical, especially- that add up to a constant weight on my shoulders.  I am unbelievably thankful that my mother, who is retired and lives 5 blocks away, helps me with the laundry and housekeeping that I would be hard pressed to get to.  I know not all working families have a grandma to help around the house 2 or 3 afternoons a week, and I hope I can be that grandma when my children are grown.

Two weeks ago my 7 year old had to have an abcess tooth removed.  He had been telling me that his tooth was "a little sore" for two weeks, but I just kept thinking "I'll call tomorrow"- and it got lost in the mix.  I felt like a failure as a parent when the dentist told us how bad his tooth really was.  We got a lecture about how we should be monitoring tooth brushing- I didn't realize we weren't.  I always tell my kids "ok, go brush your teeth!"...but that is usually said while I am trying to get myself ready, pack lunches and feed the dog.  I thought I was being attentive.  The abcess tooth really hit home.  Sometimes I drop the ball, and my kids pay the price.  It hurts and I just hope they will look back as adults and forgive me.  

My younger sister is in her 3rd year of medical school.  She has a 15 month old son and another child due in the spring.  She and her husband timed the pregnancies so that she would only have to delay her career 1 year.  With $250K student loan debt by the time she is a doctor, they wouldn't be able to start a family until very late in life had they waited to finish her schooling first.  My sister is an amazing, strong woman.  She works so hard and genuinely wants to be a doctor to help people.  But she worries that her son will see her mother in law as more of a mother figure than her, since young family finances with one of them in school has forced she and her husband to live with his parents until they move on to her residency.   Everyone praises my sister for her amazing ability to handle school and motherhood, but I know that she sometimes wants to break down and just go home to hold her child.  Her days off are so fleeting that she cherishes them and can't possibly fit all the family time she wants into her schedule right now.

My older sister is a stay at home mom of 2 children, a 5 year old girl and a 8 year old boy with sensory integration disorder and life threatening food allergies.  She volunteers at school, is heavily involved in the PTA, helps with the local wrestling team that her husband coaches and still somehow struggles to feel confident in how valuable her work is.  Lately her son has been bullied and she feels helpless and frustrated that even as a super involved parent she can't save him from this struggle.  She has the family focused life that my younger sister and I envy, yet she is lacking the feeling of personal success that we rely on to get us through missing our children.  My older sister plays a very important role in her world, but she is exhausted and undervalued by herself and her family.

In summary, we can't win.  We all feel guilty for something, and we all struggle with feelings of being inadequate.  We all tend to put the world before us, and we are all exhausted.  I feel confident that this statement applies to most women, not just those that I know and speak to personally.  So what do we need, to help deal with these feelings?

We need support.  My sisters and I are lucky to have that support in our parents, but I know not all women have that.  Our husbands try to support us and often do, but our roles in society are so different that they don't always understand the depth or reasons behind the feelings and realities we struggle with.  Women can support each other, but only when we have time to nurture those supportive relationships.

We need healthcare.  I know so many moms who have battled with mental health problems, physical challenges and illnesses that can often be the card that makes the house tumble.  We need access to healthcare- both in terms of time to see a doctor, supportive employers to allow us to get to appointments, and health insurance which makes care financially possible.  I personally feel lucky to have insurance through my employer, however, after paying $500/month for coverage for my children and I, the extra $300-500/month I spend on bills and prescriptions has me in the habit of asking "can I afford to go to the doctor?".

We need knowledge.  We need to know how to deal with the challenges that come our way.  Dealing with a child's health problem, a financial challenge in our household or trying to learn how to live a healthier lifestyle can feel incredibly isolating.  We need support groups and non-judgemental information.

We need affordable education, so that we have the opportunity to grow personally as well as know that we are setting our children up for successful futures.

We need steady job opportunities.  Because we want to break the glass ceiling, but it's hard to do from outside the building.

We need respect from our peers and loved ones in regards to our career choices.  We need to know that staying home to care for loved ones is a valuable career, and being a financial provider for the family is a career.  The world needs all kinds of women who makes all kinds of career choices.

Mostly, we need a strong message from society: You are valuable.  You are important.  What you do, the world notices.

The segment on the Today show this morning really hit home.  What do I need?  I need rest, relief from medical bills and assurance that it's ok if I drop the ball now and then, as long as I'm trying.  What do women need?  Someone to ask that question.

I hope and pray that anyone who may be having a hard time with this parenting gig can read this letter and relate to at least something in it.  I'm not intending to hurt feelings or complain or ask for anything...It's just that, after sharing this letter with the above-referenced mommy board, I realized that some women find it helpful to know that they aren't alone.  I'm one of those women, too.  So I am putting this out there and hoping that if having written this letter does nothing else, I hope it helps one woman to feel that she is not alone if she feels overwhelmed sometimes.

Merry Christmas!

Please join me.

I'm trying to work, but it isn't working.  My mind keeps travelling to Connecticut, and envisioning all sorts of things that I desperately wish were some horrible nightmare.  I won't go on and on about my feelings regarding such a senseless tragedy- I think an entire nation shares my horror and disbelief.

What I will say is this: in the aftermath of this tragedy- as well as the horrors at Clackamas Town Center earlier this week- there is bound to be a flare up debate, hard feelings, blame and large-scale talks of problem solving.  I'm no longer on Facebook, but I hear it is ablaze with talk of the shooting and arguments about where to go from here.  Of course we, as a country, need to have a dialogue about how to keep these tragic incidents from happening.  I don't want anyone to read this and think that isn't a priority in my mind.  But, before we rush into that, I have a proposal: let us pause for a moment and each do something kind.

Today at work, a mom stood in my office in tears.  We both have children who are the same age as students at this school.  I think it would be impossible not to be affected and think "what if it was my child in that room?".  We were talking about our feelings on it, our desire to keep our children innocent and untarnished by reports of these tragedies and, of course, what we can do to help.  Before she left, she said: "I just don't know what to do.  What are we supposed to do?".  When she left, she was on her way to complete a volunteer Meals On Wheels route.  I wished her a good route and she barely managed a smile- how can we smile, when our hearts are so heavy?

Suddenly, a thought occurred to me: She is doing exactly what she *should* do. 

Let me explain.

We will never be able to eliminate the hurt, pain, and devastation that humankind imposes on one another.  At any given moment, our children or community may be exposed to horrors beyond our understanding.  But today, tomorrow...unless and until that happens, they can know kindness above the horror.  The woman in my office, along with her children who deliver with her, spread love and kindness today despite the sinking feeling in her chest.  The message that such an act sent was this: unthinkable tragedy can knock us over, but kindness gives us the strength to keep going.

Of course I will be sending prayers in the direction of those families affected by these recent tragedies.  My hope is that they will comfort this community- a community which I will probably never visit, never have a personal connection to, never be able to help on a first-hand basis.  But I will do more than that.  I will make an effort to spread love and kindness, in random and unexpected ways, for as long as it takes to heal this nation. 

I've been meaning to seek out an organization to volunteer with.  I've been intending to drive around and place little thank you notes on the doorsteps of homes whose Christmas displays make me happy when I drive by.  I've been trying to get better about smiling at strangers and going out of my way to hold doors open for people, even if it means waiting for them to catch up.  Calling the Red Cross to schedule a blood donation is on my to-do list.  I have kind of gotten out of the habit of "random acts of kindness", and I know that is a good habit to keep.  This list of potential for spreading kindness grows longer the more I think of it, and I know I am not the only person with such a list in his or her head, who just hasn't gotten around to checking those line items off.

These acts will probably never directly affect the families of the victims in Connecticut, and I know that.  But maybe, just maybe, it'll spread in their direction.  And for me?  It will leave me with the feeling that, however small, I have done something to help combat the horrors of evil we sometimes face in this world.  I'm a person that wants to "do something" when faced with horror.  This, for now, is my "something".

Please join me in this small gesture of remembrance and healing. 

The BEST gluten free birthday (cup)cake.

For the last two weekends, I have been baking up a storm. My mission? Find the right recipe for non-chocolate birthday cake. Besides tasting fantastic, I wanted a cake that had a fluffy texture AND can hold up to the heavy frosting involved in making a themed birthday cake.

After 2 weekends of my house smelling like a bakery, a couple pounds added to the scale from "taste testing", and more flour than I've used in a LONG time...BAM. I did it!

For one cake, I began with a champagne cake recipe- kind of just using this mission as a chance to recreate a champagne cupcake I had at a wedding a year ago and still dream about. Since I AM trying to find a cake for a kid's party (and I don't think an alochol based dessert will make me a favorite at PTA meetings) I decided to change it up.

So, here it is:

The Best Gluten Free Birthday Cupcakes*, EVER.

2 cups gluten free flour mix **
1 Tbsp. nonfat milk powder
1 Tbsp. baking powder
1 tsp. sea salt
1/2 cup room temp. unsalted butter
1/4 cup coconut oil, melted
1 1/2 cup baker's sugar
5 egg whites
1 tsp. vanilla extract
1 cup Cherry 7-Up

Preheat oven to 350. Line cupcake pans with liners OR grease and flour cake pans*.

In a large bowl, combine baking mix, milk powder, baking powder and sea salt. Mix and set aside.

In the bowl of a mixer, combine butter and coconut oil. Mix on medium speed for 3 minutes, until white and fluffy. Add sugar in small batches, scraping sides of bowl and mixing well. Add egg whites in 2-3 batches, then add vanilla.

Alternate adding baking mix and soda into the mixer, while mixing and scraping the sides of the bowl. Do not overmix at this stage!

Pour batter in to cupcake liners or pans. Bake cupcakes for 15-18 minutes for small cupcakes, 25-28 for large cupcakes. When batter is baked, cupcakes will have beautiful golden edges and a toothpick inserted into the center will come out clean.

I frosted these cupcakes with Wilton's buttercream. Next weekend's mission is to find the perfect frosting- for Sky and I, buttercream is too sweet! But it DOES do a good job when it comes to decorating and making frosting fast.

*I used this mix for cupcakes. I have every reason to believe it will be perfect for a cake- the crust of the batter will lend itself well to a shaped cake and whatever frosting I want to pile on it. I simply don't know the baking time for this, though, if it is used in a cake. If you want to use this in a cake, 350 is a great temp for it- you'd just have to keep the oven light on and line up testing toothpicks rather than setting a timer and walking off.

**You *could* use a store bought gluten free flour subsititute. But the truth is, in the almost 3 years that Sky has been off gluten, I've just never found a store bought mix that is better than this homemade (less expensive) mix. Honestly- stop wasting your money buying expensive mixes. Buy these ingredients, mix this up, keep it in the freezer, and use it in any "regular" recipe, any time flour is called for.

Teachers, we support you!

I would like to take a moment to say THANK YOU to all the teachers of the Gresham-Barlow School District.

Our children go to school every day and enter a place where they are loved, cared for and educated. They are curious, they are happy, they are confident and they will have a bright future- thanks in no small part to the people who work so tirelessly for them every day.

I understand that both sides (the school district AND the teachers) have concessions to make in order to avoid a strike. I understand that school budgets are taking a beating, and we ALL have to make sacrifices in order to recover. I understand that my children simply won't get the same education I did, years ago, in the same schools. Change happens.

What should NOT happen is a school district completely ignoring the backbone of their organization when it comes to safety, schedules and compassion. What should NOT happen is an official distict website using language so slanderous and disresepctful to the district's employees that I- as a parent of the district, not a teacher- cringe to read such a passive agressive slap on the cheek. What should not happen is a school board walking away from negotiations while my children's education is on the line.

I have seen some things that, in my opinion, the teacher's association could bend on. I have seen the anger, the passion, the hurt that has the school board on the defensive. And guess what? I have an opinion about that.

Sometimes, just acknowledging some else's frustration goes a long way toward finding common ground. I have seen the teachers do that. Now, as a parent, I ask the district to do the same.

If a strike happens, I will be very disappointed. I will feel sad for my children, for the families of the teachers, even for some school board members whom I believe really WANT to reach an agreement. I will be sad for the district that helped form me and so many around me.

If a strike happens, my children will not cross a picket line. I do not believe that my eager to learn students will get the education they deserve while their beloved, hard working teachers stand on the sidewalk in a last attempt to be heard. Instead of sending my children in to get a sub-par education at a school which has always provided them an excellent education, my children and I will stand WITH those people who stand FOR them. My children will return to school when those schools are what every child deserves.

I ask any Gresham-Barlow parent to join me in this. We simply cannot support our schools without supporting the teachers within them.

I am confident that if the school district goes back to the table (and STAYS there as long as is neccesary), with the intent to find a respectful solution- our teachers will do the same.

Teachers: THANK YOU. From the bottom of my heart- for all you do- thank you.